HOW MY SUPERVISOR ROASTED ME

I had always promised to write about the fire I passed through under my supervisor while doing my degree project. Here we are, but, it’s been three years, and most of the anger is gone. This is mostly comedy, told by pictures in the Zikoko format. It’s something most people who did project in Ahmadu Bello University English Department, most especially the literature section, can relate to.

1, When I thought I will finish my project in three weeks

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We shall see.

2, When the list of supervisors came out and I got the dreaded SJ.

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I am not crying. It’s onion enter my eyes.

3, Mary Morah when she saw that she got one of the few kind lecturers in English Department.

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Eshe ghan

4, Me and my fellow supervisees under SJ.

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Help us oh Lord.

5, Then they selected me to be the first to take my work to him. “Kingsley, you know you are bold.”

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I am not bold again.

6, Met Herr Supervisor and he said, “I’m around but not available.”

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Chim o.

7, When he finally saw me and said “Your topic is overflogged.”

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I am not angry sir. That is how my face look like.

8, I finally dropped a topic I had been caressing for three years. Now what?

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9, Then I settled for Barack Obama’s autobiographies. But when I told my supervisor, he hadn’t read them.

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They were published last week sir.

10, Obama’s autobiographies do not represent the fulcrum of any shared literary conundrum of our elevated monologue.

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I said it. He hasn’t read the books.

11, But he was in a hurry so he asked me to submit a proposal on “Your Obama”. But my mates were in chapter two.

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No hurry in life.

12, There were more than three hundred corrections in a two-hundred word proposal

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I can’t take this

12, People who thought I will be the first to finish when they say, How project?

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We bless God.

14, I was still in chapter one when Tina came to me and said, “I don’t like this my conclusion. Please help me go through it.”

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OK ma.

15, When I saw my mates with their projects bound and ready for submission

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All fingers are not equal.

16, Half of my mates were at home and even forgot all about having done projects. But I and my fellow supervisees are in school, not knowing where to go, what to do and how to do it, nor who to run to. Then, one day, the supervisor started abusing one of us, “It’s like you didn’t do primary school.”

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I am not laughing. This is not my real face o.

17, Fathers Sunday caught me in school. I went to the chapel and saw my supervisor dancing

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God, shebi you are watching.

18, I sweated, toiled and tore. It began to look like I will not go NYSC with my mates. Then, my supervisor got bored and said “Go and bind your project.”

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Pardin. What did you say sir?

19, “Are you deaf? Go and bind your project!”

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Yes oh!

20, On my way to bind I saw my guy, under the same supervisor, still in chapter one

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Nothing to Say.

21, Next Sunday I went to church for Thanksgiving.

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I am very very grateful.

22, The devil when I wrote in the acknowledgement that my supervisor was like a father to me.

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He was a fada indeed.

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